boredom

so, i'm not sure if i put it on my last blog or not... but lately i am VERY bored, and very lonely.... due to my boyfriend working full time this current week and next, i spend my days alone... with nothing to do but watch tv, cruise the internet, read a book, or play computer games... today, is day 5 of my days alone... and frankly, i am bored out of my mind...and the ironic and sad part of it is: i keep waking up earlier and earlier.... yesterday i was wide awake at nine am, today i'm wide awake at 8 am.... ack!

so, my important conclusion is, I need a hobby. but... i've never ever really had a hobby and i don't know where to begin to think of finding one... i suppose you could call reading a hobby, but its one that i can't do allt he time... sometimes, i want to read, and sometimes i don't. i pretend i like to do crafts, but i always start things i never finish.... someday, i would like to get into scrapbooking more, but i think that is something better left for after i return to the states in a year. i dont' want to build anything - what would i do w/hundreds of toy boats, or model cars or airplanes...? so.... what does that leave me? puzzles also are great, and i enjoy them... but... again, it doens't really fit my lifestyle right now.... i would have no where to put one while working on it. so, if anyone has ANY ideas... i am wide open to suggestions!

what else is new? nothing really... i had some scary dreams last night, two of them, in which i was fighting for my life, literally... and i think that God is telling me that I am currently in a fight for my life... to stay Godly, i think... but also to find my own personal niche in life... as with any move, for a while a person feels "out of place." i currently feel a little "out of place" since I have no friends other than my boyfriend's that are here (well, my army friend.. but i can only see her now and then) and no way of makingfriends. i'm not very outgoing and especially am shy now speaking German, even with my bf. also, my sense of personal style... ie what i wear and how i look, seems a little dull and boring, i'm dying to go shopping and start being more feminine.... not because i want to attract a lot of attention or something, but because i want to feel better about myself, and when it comes to clothing and style, i've always sort of been stuck in the "i don't have any money to spend on clothes at all" look... which means a lot of t-shirts and jeans... which, is fine, i love t-shirts and jeans... but i'm eager to update my closet with some cuter t-shirts, than the five dollar ones i bought at college because they were cheap and i'm a student.... i'm sure someone out there knows what i mean!

but i suppose, that's all from me today. i'm in need of a shower, and some food (and i get to do laundry - oh yeah! i'm sooooooooo excited!) and then i'm going out... either to the river and a park that's down there to read my book (Charlie und die Schokoladenfabrik - aka - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) or to go wander around some stores downtown, to get an idea of what stores offer what for what price, so i can be more educated when i finally get to go shopping (it has been over a year since i have really gone shopping for me... i've only bought a couple of shirts and pants here and there.. and i can count them all on one hand probably, so i'm in need of some shopping). but, anyways! thanks for listening to me blog...